In Vino Snobbery

Some people when they drink want to make out. Others, presumably, tell the truth. I become a snob. I drop names, embellish experiences and say generally obnoxious things. What is UP with that? This mostly happens when I meet new people. My real friends and acquaintances know that that my life isn't that great so I can't fool them. I am not a wine snob in the least -- oaky, fruity, earthy, what do I know. What I am is a snob on wine. 

If you've lived and worked in New York for 15 years, chances are

you've met and maybe hung out with a successful, semi famous person. Or you know someone who has become successful and semi famous. But I quickly realized that knowing a successful person doth not a successful person make. It happened in my 20s, when I started getting an empty feeling from going out, I basically wasn't doing anything of value (bring out the violins). Sure, meeting new people is awesome, that is part of New York's M.O., but I wasn't actually achieving anything. And knowing someone who was did not make me achieve any more. 

There are people in this world who try to surround themselves with the rich and famous and define themselves by who they know, not what they do. They feel the fame will somehow rub off on them, or that when they need these people they will come through. (I know James Franco: I have arrived y'all). Often times, that does not happen (unless you're bffs). I liken this to being a groupie. You might be sleeping with the lead singer of the band, hanging out with his bandmates and getting into shows for free, but who is getting all the glory and money? Not you. What you get is a story. And that's valuable, sure. But it's air unless you do something with it. 

I'm sure my obnoxiousness has something to do with insecurity (how annoying, effing insecurity), but when I'm sober, I'm extremely aware of the position I occupy in the world. I'm pretty happy with it in general -- this is what happens in one's 30s, on some level it's a bit depressing -- but my 20s somehow come out when wine enters my system. I'm so not a Vino Veritas person. In fact I wake up the next morning remembering the stupidities that came out of my mouth hoping the other person was too drunk to remember. So I apologize in advance to those new people I will likely not see again.